Absolem: The Windsor’s New Sage Fish
Logan Wright stared down at the spherical bowl of water, where a little orange fish was swimming. He then looked up into the grinning faces of the Windsors accompanying him in study hall.
"What the hell is this."
The Brightmans were the first to speak, beaming with pride and looking down at the goldfish. Kurt rolled his eyes and focused more on brushing off his lapel while Blaine curiously watched the fish bobble about in his glass confines. Charlie stifled an irritated groan while Dwight simply gave the fish an evil eye.
"This is Absolem-" Ethan began.
"He’s a SAGE fish.” And at that instant, Logan didn’t like the way they emphasized the ‘sage’ title. The blond paused, bracing himself for Windsor nonsense before speaking.
"This is Absolem…and it’s a goldfish. Why is the goldfish here?" The blond said slowly, as if speaking to a bunch of young children.
“He came to us in a twist of fate!” Evan smiled as his twin painted the mystical mood via hand motions.
"Actually, he sort of came out of the faucet while Kurt was making us flapjacks, but…yeah, twist of fate." Blaine interjected, and Kurt just barely kept himself from facepalming. Logan just stared, looking to the fish as it darted around in the bowl, then to the excited twins.
"…And this is a sage fish…..that can…"
"Predict the future! He told us so!" As if Logan’s green eyes couldn’t get any wider at the conversation. The Stuart leaned away from the table to look at the group to see any indication of sarcasm or joke. The Brightmans were the only ones really seeming convinced, the others just seemed irritated or playing along to humor their tweedles.
"And you speak fish…" Logan began again, suddenly feeling very sorry for the little orange fish in the bowl.
"No, he speaks gurgle-" Ethan nodded, and Chaz couldn’t hold his groan of irritation back any longer.
"The language of the star fish." Evan added helpfully, both of them stooping low to watch the fish.
"Star….fish." Logan reached a hand up to rub his temple, hoping that the twins meant the star-shaped sea animal, and not a whole species of nonsense space fish.
"Yep! We speak gurgle too! The Caterpillar taught us!" Evan said as Ethan looked to the glass and made small noises that were a ridiculous mix between lip pops and gargling. Surprisingly, Absolem swam in circles at the odd sounds while most of the Windsors watched on.
"…….Han taught you two how to speak fish." Logan confirmed, starting to debate on whether he was dreaming or trippy on his meds again.
"Yep! Go ahead, ask him." The twins nodded before turning around as the other Windsors began to lose interest in their new pet, turning back to their long essays and last minute homework.
Logan simply looked to Absolem, the orange goldfish with the blue stripe on his tail, and reminded himself to ask what Han did to convince the Tweedles of such a stupid idea.
Absolem just happily swam in circles, absentmindedly watching the blond through the glass. He liked his new home. Very much so.